So Far Away
by ChildlikeEmpress
Summary: Kaoru sat on her bed. It was the first session of the "Let's Forget Kenshin" meeting. With her cat on one side and a pen and paper on the other, Kaoru started listing all the reasons why she and Kenshin could never work out. KxK AU
1. Part 1

This KxK is set in an Alternate Universe, in this case the U.S. Songs that inspired it include "Far Away" by Nickelback and "Lonely in Gorgeous" by Tommy February6.

Don't forget to Read and Review!

Oh yes! And the disclaimer!!!

Kenshin-not mine.

Kaoru-not mine.

Nobuhiro Watsuki-not mine.

Sony and Shonen Jump-not mine.

Anything else except the actual plot-not mine.

Kenshin: "Is anything yours?"

ChildlikeEmpress: "That pin-up of you in my locker is…muahahaha!"

Kenshin: --'

::So Far Away::

"We're leaving tonight."

Those were the three words that seemed to end life as I knew it.

Sure, we'd known that the day would come, but why now?

Why tonight?

"That sucks man, so what time are you planning on pulling out?"

Kaoru's internal musings were cut short when she felt her self cringing at Sano's question. Somehow it made it more real when someone else was agreeing with the horrible statement.

"When…" She echoed, her voice coming out as a squeak amidst the din.

Kenshin looked over at her from where he was standing by the steps. For once his face looked serious without the spacey look that Kaoru had come to associate with him.

Well, that and his beautiful smile.

"Hiko wants to get a good start, so probably around six. We don't mind driving at night but we'd like to get as far as Ft. Worth before morning."

Kaoru felt her self nodding her head but she still didn't fully comprehend it.

Of course she'd known that Kenshin's uncle was in the Military, but they'd been here for almost four years, how could they leave now? Kenshin was a senior already, how could they just pull out before graduation…

Her mouth was dry, her palms sweating, and most of all her heart was racing.

She carefully schooled her features to blankness so she wouldn't end up looking like the deer in the headlights she felt like inside.

Kenshin looked at Kaoru for a while after he'd finished speaking. It hurt him when she got that look on her face like she was about to start crying…only to suddenly blank out so you couldn't tell at all what she was thinking. Wait…why did he care if she cried or not?

His thoughts were interrupted as he realized that Megumi was hitting him in the arm repeatedly in trying to get his attention.

"What?" he hissed. Megumi let out an exaggerated sigh.

"When are you gonna tell her Kenshin?"

"Tell who what?"

"Kaoru, when are you going to tell her goodbye?"

"Before leaving, you know, when you usually say the word."

Megumi just stood there with "the look" on her face.

"What are you glaring at me for!?" Kenshin sputtered. Megumi gave him one more disgusted look before exiting. Kenshin could have sworn he'd heard her muttering under her breath at the density of all things male or something like that. He sighed as another of his friends took up his attention.

The gang had all gotten together at Sano's house, it seemed appropriate for Kenshin's impromptu farewell party. After all, it was where they had all met.

FLASHBACK

"_Do you want to play Texas Hold'em"? _

_Kenshin looked down at the cluster of teens at the little table he was passing. Hiko had made him come to this party after they'd moved into the neighborhood. Hiko said something about him meeting some "nice kids" who weren't into slicing people up for fun. The fact that Kenshin hadn't ever gotten involved in any of Katsura's "incidents" aside, apparently Hiko thought he'd meet some new friends here. So, here he was currently weaving his way through the basement of some kid named Sanosuke Sagara in search of the soda stash._

_Luckily the voice repeated her question so he was able to identify who spoke._

_The girl wasn't extraordinarily beautiful. Her blue black hair was worn long and touched her shoulders. It might have been longer if it hadn't been somewhat curled. She had big blue eyes and what he guessed was a nice nose. She wasn't very thin, but not fat either he thought. She stared at him quizzically as he took in what she wore. He laughed to himself at her daring because she was wearing a Celtics shirt in enemy territory. It didn't help that their home team had just gotten their butts kicked by the Celtics earlier that afternoon._

"_Ok. Sure." _

_Kenshin sat though part of a game but left quickly. Before he left he did find out a few things about the girl across from him. She had no clue what quality music was and she liked Gackt. Kenshin shuddered. The fact that she'd tried to salvage the conversation was lost to him as he took off._

_It was less than a week later that he noticed the girl in his classroom. She was bent over her notebook and twirling her pen in her hand unknowingly broadcasting her boredom to all who noticed. It was then he saw her wristband. _

"_You like Within Temptation?" _

_She looked up quickly, her hair flipping over her shoulder as she turned to smile at him._

"_They're my favorite!" _

_From then on every time they had class together they'd exchange some sort of pleasantry. Sometimes they talked about songs, others they talked about TV shows or anything else worth mentioning. _

_After a few weeks of this they exchanged emails. What followed was an interesting history of email conversations ranging from the funny to the absurd. _

_The girl, whose name was Kaoru, opened up a lot more. She was a lot less shy and as time went by her admiration for Kenshin grew._

_That's why Kaoru felt ill when she realized what her friend Megumi was saying._

"_The guy I told you I had a crush on? It's Kenshin." _

_Kaoru's smile faltered as Megumi continued to speak, and it was then she realized that she'd never end up with Kenshin. Not when Megumi had so much more in common with him._

_The seasons came and changed. Summer turned into fall, then winter, then spring. _

_All the while Kaoru listened to Megumi as she talked on and on about Kenshin. After a "Kenshin" session as Kaoru liked to call it, she would hang up the phone; her ear red and numb and just cry. _

_It was so hard. But no one ever knew. And if Kaoru did, she kept it to herself._

_When summer came, Kaoru saw him even less. He had stopped coming to the weekend parties at Sanosuke's because of his conflicting work schedule. Without him there to talk to Kaoru felt lonely at all the functions. She still remembered the time when he had come over and sat next to her when she was feeling particularly left out. They had talked about anything and everything while he praised the cupcakes she'd brought to share. _

_It was definitely up there on her list of favorite memories._

_So when she found out he was moving you can imagine how it went._

_Kaoru sat on her bed. It was the first session of the "Let's Forget Kenshin" meeting. _

_With her cat on one side and a pen and paper on the other, Kaoru started listing all the reasons why she and Kenshin could never work out. Then she took another sheet and started listing all the reasons why staying single forever could work for her. _

_She crumpled both sheets up and threw them in the trash._

END FLASHBACK.

So here she was, at Kenshin's farewell party. She looked around. There was Sano by the record player with Tsunan…Misao and Yahiko helping themselves to the snacks on the coffee table...the grownups were upstairs …some other people she knew by face were talking in the corner.

And there "he" was.

Kenshin was sitting on the steps with Megumi, effectively blocking anyone from going by, his legs stretched out across the path. Whatever they were talking about must have been important. Kenshin had that serious look on his face and they were awfully close to each other.

The fact that Megumi wasn't actively pursuing Kenshin anymore didn't make Kaoru feel any better. There was still an underlying bitterness where that was concerned. Kaoru felt that Megumi had taken up all of Kenshin's time that summer only to suddenly cool off when she found out he was moving.

Kaoru couldn't really blame Megumi for that though, she too had tried to "cool things off" the key word being "tried." Kenshin she realized was essential to her as breathing and reading the latest issue of Shojo Beat. She thought of him every day, even if she didn't talk to him for two weeks in between.

It was a curse.

"Hey Tori-atama! We're out of plastic glasses!" Misao's voice was loud enough to get everyone's attention effectively though there was an audible pause as everyone took time to digest this new information.

Kaoru heard herself speaking up almost immediately. "I'll get them Sano."

If she stayed down here anymore she was going to crack. She had to get out. She ran blindly past the video gamers and nearly tripped over Kenshin's feet as she went up the stairs.

"Whoa…wait up Kaoru!"

"No God, please no…don't let him follow me…"

Kaoru went the back way to the kitchen so she could avoid the adults gathered in the den.

She stopped when got to the cupboard with the glasses and braced herself against the countertop. Her shoulders hunched over as she tried to swallow the sobs rising in her throat.

Kenshin started to speak but stopped when he saw Kaoru. She was shaking. 'Oh screw it.'

"Kaoru?"

Kaoru wiped her eyes quickly, unknowingly smearing her mascara across her cheeks. She spun around with one of her bright smiles plastered on. She started to laugh insanely at the look on Kenshin's face. She had to try and stop from choking as she spoke.

"I couldn't find the right cupboard so I was opening this one and it just smacked me in the face…oh my god I'm so stupid aren't I?"

Kenshin just stared at her. "Kaoru, you always know which cupboard Sano's mom keeps the glasses in."

It was then she broke down. She started sobbing and couldn't stop. There they were standing in the Sagara's kitchen, she with her face and her hands and he gazing at her with that strange look on his face. Little did she know that what she was doing was what he hadn't done himself.

Cry because he was leaving.

Kaoru removed her hands to stare blearily at Kenshin through her tears. For a moment she seemed surprised that he was still there, but then she started speaking softly to him all that she had wanted to tell him for so long.

"I'm sorry, but I can't help it. I don't want you to go! Call me selfish but I miss you so much I want to die." She paused to gasp out a breath. "Please don't hate me, please don't hate me Kenshin."

And then suddenly his arms were around her, and the plastic glasses fell from her hands to bounce across the wood floor. Her face was buried in his band tee, and she could smell his cologne. He was so warm it chased away the chill that lingered on her skin due to the fall weather.

Kaoru had hugged Kenshin before. Then it was more of an impulsive grab she'd made at him after having too much sugar and feeling bolder than usual. But this hug was different. He initiated it. And he did it because he knew it was what she needed the most right now.

She cried quietly into his chest as his right hand held her head in place and his left rested at the small of her back. Her arms circled around him, holding him so tightly that he couldn't have gotten away if he'd tried.

It was in this position that Sano found them, his cheery voice asking about whether they had found the paper cups died out as he took in the sight before him.

Kaoru quickly let go of Kenshin and tried to extricate herself from his embrace but wasn't able to. Kenshin knew that it was too soon yet, and found himself dismissing Sano with a rather curt "could you give us a second?"

"Yeah, I'll just leave you guys alone ok…um I'll just take the cups down though."

Sano quickly stacked the glasses and took off down the steps. Kaoru and Kesnhin could hear him giving the rest of the group an explanation for their lingering absence.

Kenshin held Kaoru for a few moments more, until she was still and he could tell that she wasn't crying anymore. She stepped away from him slowly, and he gripped her arm as she seemed a little unsteady. Kaoru looked down at her feet, to the side, to his shirt, anywhere but his face. She was too scared that if she did the spell would break and she'd be all alone with just Mrs. Sagara's pumpkin bars on the counter beside her.

She frowned as she saw the mess she'd made of Kenshin's shirt. There was a big oval wet spot on the front, thankfully no snot, but still. She grimaced. "I'm sorry I messed up your shirt."

Kenshin almost laughed, it was just like Kaoru to apologize for the strangest things. Or just to apologize when she didn't need to.

"It's alright Kaoru, it'll dry so don't worry about it." He cupped her chin in his hands and made her look him in the eyes. He simply stared for a moment. Her eyes were so beautiful he realized. They were what those people in books would call "doe eyes." The sapphire orbs shimmered brightly as she gazed up at him and her black lashes were clumped together with leftover tears. Her lip was trembling so slightly it was almost unnoticeable. They were so pink and pliable. It was then that Kenshin wanted to kiss her, and he might have if they hadn't heard Sano's voice carrying up the stairs.

"Well last time I checked Kenshin and Jou-chan were talking with Hiko but I could be wrong…" The sentence was left hanging for the benefit of the two teens in the kitchen. Kenshin's hands dropped from the sides of Kaoru's face as she quietly tucked her hair behind her ears.

"You'd better go back downstairs. I'll be down in a little while."

Kenshin looked at Kaoru not getting it. She smiled tremulously at him and gestured to her red-rimmed eyes. "If I go down now Kenshin they'll know I was crying."

'_I don't cry in front of anyone._'

Kenshin blinked away the thought that popped up at her statement. He tried to remember how long they'd known each other before she'd admitted that fact to him.

"Kenshin?"

He paused at the door to the basement. "Yeah?"

"Thank you."

She smiled at him.

He smiled back.

"Don't worry about it."

As promised, Kaoru came back downstairs again in a few minutes. You'd have to have been Sherlock Holmes to have noticed the slight puffiness under her eyes or the occasional falters in her smiles.

Hiko had always told Kenshin he should have been a detective.

Key:

Gackt-J-pop artist. Popular among female fans for his great looks.

Jou-chan-"Little Missy" Sano's nickname for Kaoru

Tori-Atama-"Rooster Head" Megumi's nickname for Sano that everyone uses from time to time.


	2. Part 2

"So Far Away" Part II.

It was hard to believe it had been almost four years since the night of the party.

Kenshin had left that night of course, being the recipient of my hugs, handshakes, and pats on the back. "Good luck in your new school" "Safe travels" and "Don't let Hiko pound you for being late" were some of the farewells given by the "Kenshin-gumi."

But the farewell that Kaoru remembered most was a whispered promise and a brief touching of lips.

Hiko had gotten the truck started and was yelling impatiently for his "baka-deshi to get his scrawny little butt in the car." (I quote.) Kenshin was receiving some last minute hugs from his friends and Misao's hyperactive terrier mutt was affectionately licking his hand,

Kaoru was standing at the back of the group, and most likely would have stayed there if Megumi hadn't literally shoved her forward. "Say goodbye to Ken-san you ungrateful Tanuki, or won't you miss him when he's gone?" Kaoru didn't notice the fox ears that had popped up on Megumi's head to indicate her "teasing mode." She just felt even more upset at the comment than anything.

'If only you knew Megumi how much I'll miss him.'

Kaoru stopped in front of Kenshin and the two teens stared at each other for what seemed like eternity but in reality was only a few seconds. And then Kenshin acted.

Instead of the hug Kaoru thought she'd receive she got something much better.

In one fluid movement Kenshin had grabbed Kaoru's face and had planted a kiss on her startled lips. Kaoru was so shocked she didn't even have time to react before the kiss ended and suddenly she was staring into an intense golden gaze as she heard Kenshin whisper to her "Don't let anyone else kiss you until I come back."

And then he had swung up into his uncle's Chevy, and-as Kaoru thought to herself as she touched her lips with trembling fingers-out of her life forever.

_This time, This place  
Misused, Mistakes  
Too long, Too late  
Who was I to make you wait  
Just one chance  
Just one breath  
Just in case there's just one left  
'Cause you know,  
you know, you know_

That I love you  
I have loved you all along  
And I miss you  
Been far away for far too long  
I keep dreaming you'll be with me  
and you'll never go  
Stop breathing if  
I don't see you anymore

The years went by slowly, but the pain of Kenshin's absence was somewhat alleviated by brief emails and the occasional long distance phone call.

Despite their busy lives Kenshin and Kaoru somehow managed to stay in touch.

Nothing was said of the incident that happened at his departure. It was a sore subject for Kaoru so no mention was ever made of their kiss or the words Kenshin had spoke.

Kaoru would be starting her final year of college in the fall, while Kenshin had already graduated and had taken up a career in welding. His uncle had retired from the military and had started up a business where Kenshin could find steady work. On the side he contemplated going into culinary school, something he'd only spoken to Kaoru about. If Hiko had known about Kenshin's dreams of becoming a personal chef he would have laughed his baka-deshi out of the house.

Meanwhile Kaoru continued her studies at the college. She and Misao had been rooming together for the last three years of college, and Kaoru was working on her major in creative writing. Her greatest wish was to be a writer but in the meantime she taught classes at her father's dojo to make ends meet.

Life without Kenshin had been hard at first, but Kaoru had refused to let herself mope for very long. At first she would write sheets and sheets worth of letters that she never sent while Kenshin would sit at his computer typing for hours only to delete the words he'd written. Both didn't know what to make of their "relationship" if they could call it one. Well, they really couldn't. So they both decided to attempt to move on. A year after their separation Kenshin wrote back home about a girl he'd met at the University. Her name was Tomoe and apparently she was elegance on two legs. In retaliation, Kaoru waxed on about Seta Soujirou, her prom date for senior year.

Both relationships fell apart soon after. Kenshin couldn't look at a woman without accidentally comparing her to Kaoru, and Kaoru of course thought that no man measured up to Kenshin.

The fact that Soujirou and Tomoe met later on and got married is an altogether different story.

When Kenshin's uncle got unlimited long distance on their phone Kenshin would try to call Kaoru at least once a week. Then Kaoru got a job telemarketing for an office supply company and was able to afford long distance on her cell, so the two would talk for hours at a time on weekends like they used to before.

They would talk about anything and everything, friends, music, TV shows. What was going on in school and how they couldn't wait to graduate.

Sometimes Kaoru could swear that Kenshin's voice would change while talking to her. Sometimes it got so deep and husky that it made her shiver for some reason. Other times he acted spacey and would laugh at everything she said with the most carefree sounding voice.

Sometimes Kenshin could swear that Kaoru's voice would change while talking to him. Sometimes she was so quiet and contemplative while others she would giggle insanely and sound impossibly upbeat.

Both wondered how the other really was feeling.

It was the fourth year apart that Kenshin got the phone call he'd been waiting for. And it wasn't from Kaoru.

"Hiko?"

Kenshin stood next to his Uncle's worktable, still clutching the phone in his excitement.

"What is it baka-deshi? Can't you see I'm trying to work? Oh you can't? Maybe because you're always on the phone with that tanuki you won't admit to loving."

"Hiko!"

Hiko looked up from his gruff teasing. His baka-deshi looked serious, and surprisingly unruffled from Hiko's comment about the girl.

"Well? What is it, I don't have all day."

Kenshin took a calming breath.

"I was accepted."

"Accepted where?"

"Accepted to the culinary institute I'd told you about. I applied, and they accepted."

Hiko just stared for a moment. He'd wondered when his baka-deshi would finally realize that slaving away as a welder just wasn't what he was meant to do.

"Are you going to tell the girl?"

Kenshin nodded. "I need to pack first though."

Hiko dismissed him with a wave. "Get going then so I can get back to work."

Kenshin paused in the doorway. "Thanks for not laughing Uncle Hiko."

To his credit, Hiko waited until his nephew had gotten out of hearing range before bursting out in laughing, so long and hard that tears started streaming from his eyes.

He was still choking and sputtering as Kenshin passed by again with his suitcases. 'Some things never change.' Kenshin thought as he smirked at Hiko's closed door, not doing much to muffle the laughter within.

_On my knees, I'll ask  
Last chance for one last dance  
'Cause with you, I'd withstand  
All of hell to hold your hand  
I'd give it all  
I'd give for us  
Give anything but I won't give up  
'Cause you know,  
you know, you know_

(72 Hours later.)

Kaoru smiled in the intersection. It was the weekend, it was summer, she was going to her favorite place (being the bookstore) and Kenshin had emailed her this morning telling her he was going to call. Things were doing great.

It was as she was pulling into the bookstore parking lot when her cell started to sound off the Paradise Kiss theme song in increasingly loud rings. Kaoru quickly fished it out of her purse. "Moshi-moshi, Kaoru speaking."

"Kaoru."

It was Kenshin.

Kaoru smiled. "What's up Kenshin? It had to be something big if your calling me on a Sunday. Don't you work today?"

Kaoru could hear Kenshin chuckle on the other end of the line.

"Actually, I'm calling to ask you three very important things. You got the time?"

Kaoru replied in a puzzled tone as she pulled into her parking space. "Of course I've got the time, it's you Kenshin. What do you want to ask me?"

There was silence on the line for a little while, then Kaoru heard a noise as if someone was taking a deep breath. "Kenshin?"

"I'm here. Question number one, what are you doing right now?"

"Kaoru laughed as she leaned against the car door. "What I do every Sunday afternoon Kenshin, go to the bookstore. You remember; the one on 72nd and Meredith."

"I thought so. Just checking."

Kaoru frowned. "What do you mean just checking? Why do you care all of a sudden where I spend my Sunday afternoons?"

"Sheesh Kaoru, I say something simple and you give me hell for it."

Kaoru laughed. "Don't I always?"

"Yes you do. Now, question number two…"

Kaoru could hear noises in the background on Kenshin's end. At first it just seemed like he was breathing heavier than normal but now she could have sworn she'd heard the blare of a horn.

"Kenshin, are you outside?"

There was more silence, then. "Kaoru, do you remember the last thing I told you before I left?"

There was a long pause as Kaoru was suddenly silent.

"Kaoru?"

"Yes. I remember Kenshin."

Kaoru could hear Kenshin sigh almost as if in relief, and then he was speaking again.

"So you haven't kissed anyone since? Not even that Soujirou guy?"

"No!" Kaoru bit out in exasperation. "Why do you care Kenshin? It's not like you even like me that way!"

There was another pause. "Kaoru I thought you weren't the type to assume things like Megumi."

"What's that supposed to mean?" Kaoru said softly. And then there was nothing.

"Kenshin? Kenshin?? Kenshin!"

Kaoru looked down at her phone in horror "Dropped Call" blinking across the screen.

"No! No damn it!" Kaoru would have burst into tears if she hadn't heard the voice behind her.

"What I meant Kaoru, is that if you really believe I don't like you like that, well then my third question won't work out at all."

Kaoru stiffened and then with her eyes wide spun around…to be face to face with…

"Ken…shin?"

_So far away  
Been far away for far too long  
So far away  
Been far away for far too long  
But you know, you know, you know_

I wanted  
I wanted you to stay  
'Cause I needed  
I need to hear you say  
That I love you  
I have loved you all along  
And I forgive you  
For being away for far too long

He held out his arms to her, and then suddenly she had launched herself into them.

And just like that night four years ago, she was crying onto his shirt and he was cradling her gently in his embrace. His cologne tickled her nose as she pulled back far enough to look into his eyes.

This time when Kenshin was confronted with her tearstained face he didn't stop himself.

His lips descended onto hers in less than a second, memorizing their feel as he ran his fingers through her hair.

It was obvious Kaoru hadn't kissed anyone since he had left because she was slow to respond, her lips overly careful as she fumbled to kiss back with as much intensity as he.

He smirked against her mouth in pride because he knew that it would be him, and only him who would teach her how to kiss.

Eventually the couple did have to breathe, and Kaoru sagged against him in bliss unaware of the looks they were getting from the bookstore customers. (Who, Kenshin thought, apparently didn't know what a little PDA was.)

It was sometime later when Kaoru remembered to ask him what the third question was.

"Kenshin?" Kaoru giggled as she heard Kenshin make a grunt that she assumed was acknowledgement. "What was the third thing you were going to ask me?"

Kenshin smiled as he gazed into Kaoru's flushed face. She looked adorable with her lips swollen and her cheeks that dusty pink. Looking at her almost made him forget to answer.

(Almost.)

"Kaoru, remember when I told you I was trying to get into a culinary school?"

Kaoru looked up immediately, noting Kenshin's excited expression.

"Yes, I remember…"

"Kaoru, I got accepted!"

It was as if cold water had been poured over her. If Kenshin had been accepted, then he would have to leave again. She smiled ruefully. It had been too good to be true.

"That's….wonderful. I'm so happy for you Kenshin…so happy…"

Kenshin immediately could tell that for some reason the news was distressing to Kaoru, but he couldn't figure out why.

"Kaoru, I can tell you're lying, why are you upset?"

Kaoru looked down at her shoes. "Because you'll be leaving again."

There was a slight pause before Kenshin started laughing, trying in vain to stop as he noticed that Kaoru was looking rather mad at him…

"You Jerk! You came back here, kissed me senseless then tell me that you've been accepted into a school half way across the country! I'll miss you! Don't you know that! It's not funny!" The last came out as a sob, which Kenshin hurridly tried to dispel.

"Kaoru! Stop, don't cry! I'm sorry I laughed, it's my fault I didn't tell you."

Kaoru looked up, choking a bit on her tears. "Didn't tell me what?"

"The school I got accepted into is here."

Kaoru gazed at him in shock. "Here?!"

Kenshin grinned crazily at her expression. "Yes here! Here so we can be together."

Kaoru smiled the most brilliant smile then, but any more squeals of excitement were stamped out as Kenshin covered her mouth with his own, and they clung to each other, never wanting to let the other go.

_So keep breathing  
'Cause I'm not leaving you anymore  
Believe it  
Hold on to me and, never let me go  
Keep breathing  
'Cause I'm not leaving you anymore  
Believe it  
Hold on to me and, never let me go  
Keep breathing  
Hold on to me and, never let me go  
Keep breathing  
Hold on to me and, never let me go_

"Kenshin?"

"What Kaoru?"

"You never asked me the third question."

Kenshin chuckled.

"Kaoru, will you marry me?"

There wasn't even a pause before he heard the answer.

"Yes!!!!!!!"

OWARI/END


End file.
